Thursday, January 28, 2010

Colorful characters

My kid will want to kill me one day for sharing this, but what kind of Mommy-blogger would I be if I didn't?

I now work part-time from home. Its great to get up in the morning, have breakfast with my jammie-clad kiddies and then retreat to my office in yoga pants and a sweatshirt for a few hours of work. The only issue I have with the set-up is that my office has a door, which, as any mother knows, increases their child's interest in what they're doing exponentially.

So yesterday I'm working away when Will comes downstairs. I notice what look like scratches on his face.

"Will, buddy - what happened? Where did you get those scratches?" The kid, in turn, looks at me as if I've grown an arm out of my forehead.

"I no skatches, Momma."

I lean closer. Aha. Its marker.

"Honey, did you color on your face?"

"Nope. Nit-o-nis colored on me." Asking a two-year-old why he would let his brother color on his face is futile. I might as well ask the cat. Instead, I call on Nicholas.

"What Mom?"

"Did you color on your brother's face?"

"Uh, yeah. Sorry."

"Why would you do that? You know you don't color on anything but paper."

"I know. But I already colored on my peter and my butt, so..."

"YOU WHAT?!?" My kids know the proper names for their body parts, but I'm sure you can guess what he was talking about.

It was just this moment that Jay came downstairs and heard the conversation. Without saying a word, he picked the boy up and pulled down his pants.

Sure enough, his little boy bits were red. As were the scribbles on his derrier.

Choking back a laugh I asked, "Why would you color on that?"

"I dunno. Just cuz." He shrugged. I may as well have asked why he was wearing gray socks.

Jay and I both doubled over in laughter as we realized what Nick had said...that marker touched his little brother's face after it had touched his nether regions.

I am in such big trouble in a couple of years.

10 comments:

Heather said...

I laughed out loud when you shared this story on Facebook. Mine never colored her privates, but she did come out of her room once sporting a nice mosaic of war paint on her face courtesy of Crayola. She was very pleased with herself. My husband and I just gawked at her and she was all, "What?"

Secret Mom Thoughts said...

Awesome! I thought my daughter's green nose and blue hand were bad but this is better.

colleen said...

So unless I missed something you still haven't blogged about quitting your job and what you're doing now!!!

Also? I'm terrified for when my boys are a bit older. Goodness!

mammydiaries said...

Thanks for the laugh :) We're in the middle of a sleep strike and I needed it!

Green Girl in Wisconsin said...

I'm laughing--and while my sons have liberally markered themselves, they've NEVER done that area before! A first to read something someone else's kids have done that mine haven't!!!

Melisa with one S said...

Dude! Get that kid some coloring books, stat!

Colleen said...

That is just an awesome story. lol

Becca @ Our Crazy Boys said...

The best part of this story for me is knowing that it could have very well been written on my blog.

But I'm thankful that it's not. :)

I love those parenting moments when you laugh really hard and then have to say "Now, it's funny, but it's not ok."

Heather, Queen of Shake Shake said...

That is hilarious.

And as far as stories like this go, I just figure it's payback for my kids not sleeping through the night until they were 4.

Lovely Lalo-Cha said...

ROTFLMAO! He he..that is such a funny story. Although I am not shocked that your little guys did that. They are too sweet.